I found this little thing over at beaucoupkevin(dot)com and this is what it came up with for me...

Your challenge is to write crossover fanfiction combining Harvey Birdman and X-Files.
The story should use starting a band as a plot device!

Generated by the Terrible Crossover Fanfiction Idea Generator

I think 98% of fanfic is ridiculous, but this may have potential....

New Poll

Vote in my new poll! Sweet!

Ask The Batman...

Dear Batman,

I've been having some problems getting my boyfriend to be completely honest with me. Sometimes he comes home late and won't tell me where he's been all night. I'm afraid he might be cheating! What's the best way to get information out of him?

Worried in Gotham

Dear Worried,


I find that the best way to get a perp to give up information is to inflict as much pain as possible in a very short amount of time. If you are in a hurry, because your girlfriend's heart has been removed by a psychopath who wants to kill you, I suggest the 'electrified toilet bowl' method as I demonstrated in Detective Comics #849 on the Scarecrow.


I think you'll find it very easy and effective.
Sincerely, The Batman

Quick Hits

Venom: Dark Origins # 3:

The symbiote is evil. I know this because...


...the thing will twang you in the eye!

Spider-Man Noir #1

The "Marvel Noir" thing looks pretty cool. I'll be keeping an eye on this.

Wolverine #8

I am currently reading through Marvel Essentials: Wolverine Vol. 1, and I have to say that it is reminding me why Wolverine is such a popular character in the first place. These old stories are spectacular, especially when he is spending time in Madripoor as "Patch". The best so far is #8:


The Hulk (Mr. Fixit at the time) shows up and Wolverine does nothing but play pranks on the guy for the whole issue, tricking the Big Grey Guy into foiling his own mission. Fantastic. Read some Essentials to remember what Wolverine was like before he was starring in 30 books a month.

The Poll - After tallying the votes (all 5 of them) we have an inconclusive tie! Let's call it even and say that we are currently in a comic-based movie renaissance, and the next few years look to be some of the most exciting ever for fans of comics and movies. Lets just hope we keep getting more like "Iron Man" and that this never happens:

Good answer...

I asked a friend of mine recently, 'Who would you rather be, Wally West or Barry Allen?' I didn't realize that he had no idea that either of these men were The Flash, so I explained that to him.

His answer: "Frank Castle."




Correct.

Thunder!....

Thunderbolts #124

Once again, another solid issue by Christos Gage, who just seems to get what it is that makes a team of villains work. Think about this, if you will: 'Who is the better leader, Captain America or Norman Osborn?' Now, I know this seems like an easy answer, but think about it for a minute. Cap most famously led the Avengers, a group of heroes who, while they all had their individual personality quirks, were all heroes and all generally were working towards the same goal. On the other side, we have Osborn who is leading a group of villains, who were all forced onto the Thunderbolts team by the government and are all trying to benefit themselves at whatever the cost to their teammates. And in issue #124, Osborn leads the team magnificently, even getting the craziest of the kooks (Bullseye and Venom) to work together.

I argue further that Osborn is perfectly trained for this assignment, as he was the head of a powerful corporate entity for many years (OsCorp), while in his spare time, kept himself busy killing Peter Parker's girlfriend and throwing exploding pumpkins around. Talk about an overachiever.

My favorite moments from this issue:

1) "Well, that was surprisingly therapeutic."
- The aforementioned Osborn, after manically gunning down 4 or 5 Skrulls disguised as Spider-man

2) Radioactive Man needing to take a trip into space to explode a little...WHRAKA-THOOOM!

3) Swordsman's sister...well, that was fun while it lasted...

4) The look of pure joy on Bullseye's face in this panel:

Have you ever seen someone who was so happy about shooting people in the face?

I can't recommend this title enough. As Bullseye would say, "You're sick, I can respect that."

------
Quick reminder, vote in the poll if you haven't already, and keep an eye out for a new one at the end of the week!

Hellboy and Greatness

I just finished reading Hellboy: The Crooked Man, a three part mini that wrapped with the final issue last Wednesday. I ask you this, what is greater than Hellboy? The answer: Hellboy smacking the crap out of a hillbilly devil with a holy shovel. Yes. That is why Mike Mignola is better than everyone.

This little element was the highlight of my comic readings this week, though I will get to my 'hit list' from Thunderbolts later. But first, a discussion on the merits of Hellboy.

During a discussion with a friend of mine, the question was raised, 'Are there any bad Hellboy stories?' Now, neither of us would consider ourselves scholars of Hellboy, there are many Hellboy stories we have yet to read, though we do consider ourselves fans. But we could not come up with a single story we thought was 'not good,' let alone bad, concerning Hellboy. In my own mind, I could maybe think of a few that I could classify as 'slow' or perhaps 'not long enough' but these are minor complaints. Including the movies and cartoons, there is no honest to goodness 'bad' Hellboy story, and I hope I never come across one.

This is all just a testament to how good Mignola is, weaving his supernatural tales from actual researched folklore and great storytelling. I feel that as long as Mignola has control over the fantastic characters he has created, they will never cease to entertain.

Made from a Vibranium/Sugar Alloy...

Last Saturday I went to a birthday party for the fantastic proprietor of Charging Star Comics, and my wife, being awesome, decided to make cookies. But not just any cookies. Behold!


The Cap shield cookies are sugar cookies colored with homemade icing, and the star in center is another cookie! The Bat-cookies are peanut butter chocolate sugar cookies with chocolate drizzled on them. Most importantly they were extremely yummy. Maybe I will ask for Mjolnir shaped cookies in the future....

Comics from the week that was

Today, I would like to throw down the gauntlet. I can't take it anymore. You think you know something, and then all of a sudden, it is like none of that matters. What I am referring to, specifically, are the rules surrounding of the weapons of Thor and Beta Ray Bill, Mjolnir and Stormbreaker respectively. Do they exist? Are the rules there to be broken? Do the writers not know what they are talking about? Frankly, I'm getting a little peeved. You'd think enchanted hammers would be more reliable than this...

In SI: Thor #2, we see that the Skrulls have taken Stormbreaker and cut it in half, welded sword blades to it, and gave it to their genetically modified god-killer super-skrull. We know that Stormbreaker is the same as Mjolnir. It is made of Uru metal, which is particular to Asgard and is like a magical sponge. Also, it needs to be forged in the core of a star. I 'd like to see the tech the Skrulls are using, because if they have a tool than can surgically slice forged Uru metal, we are all doomed.

Other than that little quirk, this issue is top-notch, as we get to see the Asgardians battle savagely against the invading army, and anytime there are many a Skrull split in twain, mine heart rejoices!

I also picked up The Age of The Sentry, which is a fantastic book done in the Silver-age style. The art and over-the-top stories are quirky and fun, just like the 60's. Groovy, man. Know that I am not a fan of the Sentry whatsoever, I think the current Marvel U can do without a Superman clone, even if he does have severe issues. But this book tells the type of stories that The Sentry was created to emulate, and they are done quite well by writers Jeff Parker and Paul Tobin. My favorite is probably the villain Cranio, a dude with three brains in a jar on his head. Talk about your over-achiever.

Upcoming, I will attempt to organize my comic collection, a mighty undertaking if ever there was. I will update periodically to tell of my progress and to share any gems I might find buried in the Longboxes of Doom. Wish me luck.

AWESOME

Click to see the results of the Batchuk contest over at the ISB. This one was my favorite.

Two great tastes...

It seems like it has been raining everywhere in America recently (especially in Texas), and no exception here, which means it has been a great time to read comics!

If you remember from my previous post, Detective Comics #848 was delayed by Diamond to my local shop, so I had to wait a week. I am a huge fan of Batman, and Paul Dini has been doing great things in Detective since the One Year Later leap after the Crisis Whatever. (Too many crises for my taste) In my opinion, Paul Dini and Batman are a pairing that produces tastier results than peanut butter and jelly, steak and potatoes, or BBQ wings and Yuengling Lager. He has been going through a process of re-inventing many of Batman's villains, essentially blowing out the cobwebs and making for some exciting and twisted new stories.

This issue is supposedly a tie-in with the Batman R.I.P. storyline that I also have not been following. In the midst of a 5 part Hush story, the first two parts have not been all that interesting. The pieces were being set up, we learned a little more about Hush's past, but all that has been generally mundane. The very fact that it is a 5-parter, while for the past year Dini has been producing great stand alone and two-parters, makes me pine for a return to the previous formula.

That being said, this issue contains part 3 of Heartstrings, and Dini really puts the hammer down in some freaky ways. We find out that Hush is up to his old tricks, hiring old adversaries to distract Batman while Hush himself sets his various wheels in motion. In this instance, Scarecrow lures Bats to a cave where he has kidnapped a 10 year old boy. The boy, Colin, had been in therapy for paranoia and violent tendencies. Crane has viciously hooked the boy up to a system much like Bane uses, and gives him a shot of the Venom drug, turning Colin into a hulking monster. We get to see the more manipulative side of the Scarecrow that Dini has been cultivating up to this point, using an orphaned paranoid child as a weapon that Batman cannot fight back against.

Meanwhile, Hush has kidnapped Catwoman for his own nefarious plans, which are yet to be revealed. He leaves her mutilated in a very sci-fi monster movie way, but in a way that sends the message to Bruce that he will never be allowed to love as long as Hush is around.

Dini has twisted this arc around, and now I'm looking forward to where it will eventually end up.

Meanwhile, in Secret Invasion #6...

The proverbial poo is hitting the proverbial fan in the Marvel Universe. Thor makes his appearance in the main book, and is none too happy, (I'm sure we will learn more about this in Secret Invasion: Thor...) and the remnants of the Avengers have scraped themselves together just in time to face down a crap-load of Skrulls. Three great things from this issue and one question:

1) The protester-kids who are enamored with the Skrulls and their policy of change. (one of the kids is kind of set on fire by a Skrull, by the way)

2) The arrival of Thor and his asking of the new Captain America, "Who are you supposed to be?" To which Cap-Bucky replies, "Who do I look like?"

3) The "ASSEMBLE!" splash page gives me chills a little.

?) GalactuSkrull. Really? I can't tell if that is totally awesome or...um...not. Feel free to weigh in on this. I got nothing.

Quick Updates

I got Metallica's new album Death Magnetic today. It rocks. This is Metallica reclaiming the ground they lost (St. Anger) with FORCE. It is a statement forged in pure thrash-metal that says, "We are back and we are metal." This album defines modern metal again, just like Master of Puppets and ...And Justice For All did in the 80's. I could go on and on, just listen to it if you ever liked metal.


In comic-related news (imagine that...) check out the link to newsrama for what looks like the coolest thing this side of Beta Ray Bill himself. Wolves of Odin looks like it was made from pure, distilled awesome. I'll be getting it when it drops in November. VIKINGS vs. WEREWOLVES!
What more do you need?

Tomorrow, the comics I read this week, and an update on the Skrull Invasion!