Merry Christmas!

Hoping everyone has a happy holiday.

Just had to share this with you all:

The Golden Age "Golden Guardian" lets his gun do the talking!


Even superheroes with the power of a million exploding suns need to exercise their Second Amendment rights every now and then.

From Age of the Sentry #4, which continues to be one of the best comics of the year.

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year from the Beta Ray Blog!

Posting

Sorry for the lack of posts everyone. Holidays and work are keeping me more than busy. But keep watching this space, I will come back on a more regular basis.

Ah yes...

I LIVE AGAIN!

SEE!
The new trailer for Star Trek

THRILL!
The preview of Spider-man Noir #1

BEHOLD!
The DC Universe slowly being torn apart from the inside....

SHOCK!
The Poll results are in, 9 out of 10 prefer Watchmen to the other leading brands! Check out the most recent trailer and try to contain yourself!

Whew!
New poll, let your voice be heard!

yes, still I LIVE!

Tomorrow, new posts, and a new poll!

I found this little thing over at beaucoupkevin(dot)com and this is what it came up with for me...

Your challenge is to write crossover fanfiction combining Harvey Birdman and X-Files.
The story should use starting a band as a plot device!

Generated by the Terrible Crossover Fanfiction Idea Generator

I think 98% of fanfic is ridiculous, but this may have potential....

New Poll

Vote in my new poll! Sweet!

Ask The Batman...

Dear Batman,

I've been having some problems getting my boyfriend to be completely honest with me. Sometimes he comes home late and won't tell me where he's been all night. I'm afraid he might be cheating! What's the best way to get information out of him?

Worried in Gotham

Dear Worried,


I find that the best way to get a perp to give up information is to inflict as much pain as possible in a very short amount of time. If you are in a hurry, because your girlfriend's heart has been removed by a psychopath who wants to kill you, I suggest the 'electrified toilet bowl' method as I demonstrated in Detective Comics #849 on the Scarecrow.


I think you'll find it very easy and effective.
Sincerely, The Batman

Quick Hits

Venom: Dark Origins # 3:

The symbiote is evil. I know this because...


...the thing will twang you in the eye!

Spider-Man Noir #1

The "Marvel Noir" thing looks pretty cool. I'll be keeping an eye on this.

Wolverine #8

I am currently reading through Marvel Essentials: Wolverine Vol. 1, and I have to say that it is reminding me why Wolverine is such a popular character in the first place. These old stories are spectacular, especially when he is spending time in Madripoor as "Patch". The best so far is #8:


The Hulk (Mr. Fixit at the time) shows up and Wolverine does nothing but play pranks on the guy for the whole issue, tricking the Big Grey Guy into foiling his own mission. Fantastic. Read some Essentials to remember what Wolverine was like before he was starring in 30 books a month.

The Poll - After tallying the votes (all 5 of them) we have an inconclusive tie! Let's call it even and say that we are currently in a comic-based movie renaissance, and the next few years look to be some of the most exciting ever for fans of comics and movies. Lets just hope we keep getting more like "Iron Man" and that this never happens:

Good answer...

I asked a friend of mine recently, 'Who would you rather be, Wally West or Barry Allen?' I didn't realize that he had no idea that either of these men were The Flash, so I explained that to him.

His answer: "Frank Castle."




Correct.

Thunder!....

Thunderbolts #124

Once again, another solid issue by Christos Gage, who just seems to get what it is that makes a team of villains work. Think about this, if you will: 'Who is the better leader, Captain America or Norman Osborn?' Now, I know this seems like an easy answer, but think about it for a minute. Cap most famously led the Avengers, a group of heroes who, while they all had their individual personality quirks, were all heroes and all generally were working towards the same goal. On the other side, we have Osborn who is leading a group of villains, who were all forced onto the Thunderbolts team by the government and are all trying to benefit themselves at whatever the cost to their teammates. And in issue #124, Osborn leads the team magnificently, even getting the craziest of the kooks (Bullseye and Venom) to work together.

I argue further that Osborn is perfectly trained for this assignment, as he was the head of a powerful corporate entity for many years (OsCorp), while in his spare time, kept himself busy killing Peter Parker's girlfriend and throwing exploding pumpkins around. Talk about an overachiever.

My favorite moments from this issue:

1) "Well, that was surprisingly therapeutic."
- The aforementioned Osborn, after manically gunning down 4 or 5 Skrulls disguised as Spider-man

2) Radioactive Man needing to take a trip into space to explode a little...WHRAKA-THOOOM!

3) Swordsman's sister...well, that was fun while it lasted...

4) The look of pure joy on Bullseye's face in this panel:

Have you ever seen someone who was so happy about shooting people in the face?

I can't recommend this title enough. As Bullseye would say, "You're sick, I can respect that."

------
Quick reminder, vote in the poll if you haven't already, and keep an eye out for a new one at the end of the week!

Hellboy and Greatness

I just finished reading Hellboy: The Crooked Man, a three part mini that wrapped with the final issue last Wednesday. I ask you this, what is greater than Hellboy? The answer: Hellboy smacking the crap out of a hillbilly devil with a holy shovel. Yes. That is why Mike Mignola is better than everyone.

This little element was the highlight of my comic readings this week, though I will get to my 'hit list' from Thunderbolts later. But first, a discussion on the merits of Hellboy.

During a discussion with a friend of mine, the question was raised, 'Are there any bad Hellboy stories?' Now, neither of us would consider ourselves scholars of Hellboy, there are many Hellboy stories we have yet to read, though we do consider ourselves fans. But we could not come up with a single story we thought was 'not good,' let alone bad, concerning Hellboy. In my own mind, I could maybe think of a few that I could classify as 'slow' or perhaps 'not long enough' but these are minor complaints. Including the movies and cartoons, there is no honest to goodness 'bad' Hellboy story, and I hope I never come across one.

This is all just a testament to how good Mignola is, weaving his supernatural tales from actual researched folklore and great storytelling. I feel that as long as Mignola has control over the fantastic characters he has created, they will never cease to entertain.

Made from a Vibranium/Sugar Alloy...

Last Saturday I went to a birthday party for the fantastic proprietor of Charging Star Comics, and my wife, being awesome, decided to make cookies. But not just any cookies. Behold!


The Cap shield cookies are sugar cookies colored with homemade icing, and the star in center is another cookie! The Bat-cookies are peanut butter chocolate sugar cookies with chocolate drizzled on them. Most importantly they were extremely yummy. Maybe I will ask for Mjolnir shaped cookies in the future....

Comics from the week that was

Today, I would like to throw down the gauntlet. I can't take it anymore. You think you know something, and then all of a sudden, it is like none of that matters. What I am referring to, specifically, are the rules surrounding of the weapons of Thor and Beta Ray Bill, Mjolnir and Stormbreaker respectively. Do they exist? Are the rules there to be broken? Do the writers not know what they are talking about? Frankly, I'm getting a little peeved. You'd think enchanted hammers would be more reliable than this...

In SI: Thor #2, we see that the Skrulls have taken Stormbreaker and cut it in half, welded sword blades to it, and gave it to their genetically modified god-killer super-skrull. We know that Stormbreaker is the same as Mjolnir. It is made of Uru metal, which is particular to Asgard and is like a magical sponge. Also, it needs to be forged in the core of a star. I 'd like to see the tech the Skrulls are using, because if they have a tool than can surgically slice forged Uru metal, we are all doomed.

Other than that little quirk, this issue is top-notch, as we get to see the Asgardians battle savagely against the invading army, and anytime there are many a Skrull split in twain, mine heart rejoices!

I also picked up The Age of The Sentry, which is a fantastic book done in the Silver-age style. The art and over-the-top stories are quirky and fun, just like the 60's. Groovy, man. Know that I am not a fan of the Sentry whatsoever, I think the current Marvel U can do without a Superman clone, even if he does have severe issues. But this book tells the type of stories that The Sentry was created to emulate, and they are done quite well by writers Jeff Parker and Paul Tobin. My favorite is probably the villain Cranio, a dude with three brains in a jar on his head. Talk about your over-achiever.

Upcoming, I will attempt to organize my comic collection, a mighty undertaking if ever there was. I will update periodically to tell of my progress and to share any gems I might find buried in the Longboxes of Doom. Wish me luck.

AWESOME

Click to see the results of the Batchuk contest over at the ISB. This one was my favorite.

Two great tastes...

It seems like it has been raining everywhere in America recently (especially in Texas), and no exception here, which means it has been a great time to read comics!

If you remember from my previous post, Detective Comics #848 was delayed by Diamond to my local shop, so I had to wait a week. I am a huge fan of Batman, and Paul Dini has been doing great things in Detective since the One Year Later leap after the Crisis Whatever. (Too many crises for my taste) In my opinion, Paul Dini and Batman are a pairing that produces tastier results than peanut butter and jelly, steak and potatoes, or BBQ wings and Yuengling Lager. He has been going through a process of re-inventing many of Batman's villains, essentially blowing out the cobwebs and making for some exciting and twisted new stories.

This issue is supposedly a tie-in with the Batman R.I.P. storyline that I also have not been following. In the midst of a 5 part Hush story, the first two parts have not been all that interesting. The pieces were being set up, we learned a little more about Hush's past, but all that has been generally mundane. The very fact that it is a 5-parter, while for the past year Dini has been producing great stand alone and two-parters, makes me pine for a return to the previous formula.

That being said, this issue contains part 3 of Heartstrings, and Dini really puts the hammer down in some freaky ways. We find out that Hush is up to his old tricks, hiring old adversaries to distract Batman while Hush himself sets his various wheels in motion. In this instance, Scarecrow lures Bats to a cave where he has kidnapped a 10 year old boy. The boy, Colin, had been in therapy for paranoia and violent tendencies. Crane has viciously hooked the boy up to a system much like Bane uses, and gives him a shot of the Venom drug, turning Colin into a hulking monster. We get to see the more manipulative side of the Scarecrow that Dini has been cultivating up to this point, using an orphaned paranoid child as a weapon that Batman cannot fight back against.

Meanwhile, Hush has kidnapped Catwoman for his own nefarious plans, which are yet to be revealed. He leaves her mutilated in a very sci-fi monster movie way, but in a way that sends the message to Bruce that he will never be allowed to love as long as Hush is around.

Dini has twisted this arc around, and now I'm looking forward to where it will eventually end up.

Meanwhile, in Secret Invasion #6...

The proverbial poo is hitting the proverbial fan in the Marvel Universe. Thor makes his appearance in the main book, and is none too happy, (I'm sure we will learn more about this in Secret Invasion: Thor...) and the remnants of the Avengers have scraped themselves together just in time to face down a crap-load of Skrulls. Three great things from this issue and one question:

1) The protester-kids who are enamored with the Skrulls and their policy of change. (one of the kids is kind of set on fire by a Skrull, by the way)

2) The arrival of Thor and his asking of the new Captain America, "Who are you supposed to be?" To which Cap-Bucky replies, "Who do I look like?"

3) The "ASSEMBLE!" splash page gives me chills a little.

?) GalactuSkrull. Really? I can't tell if that is totally awesome or...um...not. Feel free to weigh in on this. I got nothing.

Quick Updates

I got Metallica's new album Death Magnetic today. It rocks. This is Metallica reclaiming the ground they lost (St. Anger) with FORCE. It is a statement forged in pure thrash-metal that says, "We are back and we are metal." This album defines modern metal again, just like Master of Puppets and ...And Justice For All did in the 80's. I could go on and on, just listen to it if you ever liked metal.


In comic-related news (imagine that...) check out the link to newsrama for what looks like the coolest thing this side of Beta Ray Bill himself. Wolves of Odin looks like it was made from pure, distilled awesome. I'll be getting it when it drops in November. VIKINGS vs. WEREWOLVES!
What more do you need?

Tomorrow, the comics I read this week, and an update on the Skrull Invasion!

New Information on the Skrull Invasion

Obviously, the level of infiltration achieved by the Skrulls is deeper than we previously imagined. New photos have surfaced recently, and they show just how deep this conspiracy goes. This new information goes a long way in explaining some of the inconsistencies in recent years.

This shocking photo was just uncovered from the stolen archive of records from a Skrull command ship:

At least this explains St. Anger...

El Diablo Numero Uno

Due to Diamond deciding not to send my local comic shop any copies of Detective Comics this week, I instead picked up El Diablo #1, DC's new mini-series by Jai Nitz. I had read a preview on Newsrama and thought I'd take a peek.

This issue marks the third iteration of the character, the first being Lazarus Lane from All-Star Western #2 in 1970. Originally part of a host of western characters, this newest version brings the character into a modern day setting while keeping a connection to its roots.

The story starts by introducing Chato Santana and his partner in crime, Jorge, as they put the finishing touches on a deal with H.I.V.E. to supply their gang members in L.A. with new energy beam weapons. We learn that Chato is a pretty despicable person all around, head of a violent street gang whose members are recruited at an early age. The deal goes down but is interrupted by Agent Aaron and his S.W.A.T. team. Chato is shot in the back by his now former partner and caught by the cops. During the fire fight, we learn that the H.I.V.E. standard issue rapid fire energy pistol makes the sound effect ZARK when fired.

Once the copious amount of sound-effects have died down and the smoke has cleared, Chato wakes up to find himself a paraplegic from his gunshot wound. Agent Aaron attempts to get Chato to roll over on his gang by making him bunk with various crazies in the psych ward. One of his roommates happens to be Lazarus Lane himself, now 170 years old and who has apparently been in a coma for decades.

Chato relates his life story to Lane, which I gathered was Jai Nitz's attempt to make the reader sympathetic with the lead character. It doesn't work, at least not for me. Despite Chato showing total loyalty to his gang by refusing every offer handed to him in exchange for information, including an offer to walk again via an experimental operation, this is the only virtue that comes across. He is still a ruthless gang banger with grand designs on expanding his power base through violent and exploitative means. If Nitz is aiming for sympathy, he misses the mark. I'm not saying I completely dislike the character, but I'm not sure I'm on the same page as Nitz.

After Chato refuses every offer to co-operate, Agent Aaron puts the word out that Chato did turn on his gang expecting the inevitable retaliation to finish off Chato once and for all. It works, and while Chato is being stabbed, he finds himself transported to the Spirit World, where Lane offers him the power of El Diablo. Two words: Ghost Rider. Not necessarily a bad thing, but I couldn't help but draw the obvious comparisons. The scene in which Lane offers Chato the opportunity to take his place as El Diablo is very much the end of the Ghost Rider movie, when Sam Elliot reveals his true nature. We learn very little about the extent of the powers Chato now possesses as El Diablo, but I guess being Hell's Assassin is preferable to being either a) dead or b) a paraplegic stool pigeon.

Overall an OK read. I understand that much needed to be set up for the rest of the six-issue mini. My hope and my suggestion is that the series differentiate itself from Ghost Rider as much as possible in the next few issues. This could be an excellent story provided it doesn't become a retread of something Marvel has done before and has done better.

Thunderbolts Engage!

One of Marvel's more offbeat titles that I have been reading and enjoying is Thunderbolts. I hopped on the bandwagon after Civil War when Warren Ellis took over writing it. I had not previously read much Thunderbolts at all up to that point, but I thought I'd give the new cast of crazies a try. Ellis's two arcs, Faith in Monsters and Caged Angels, were very entertaining and well written. The sheer magnitude of insanity came through on every page. My only complaint was Mike Deodato's art, while good, was a bit too photo-referenced for my taste. Norman Osborn looked a little too much like Tommy Lee Jones.

I was a little disappointed when I heard that Ellis was leaving Thunderbolts. I had heard good things about writer Christos Gage, but I was unsure he could hit all the same notes as Ellis. I liked the dark humor, the brutality, the fact that this was a government sponsored team of the most dangerous lunatics in the Marvel Universe with a PR department. Add into the mix that the next few issues are the requisite Secret Invasion tie-ins, and I had low expectations. And buying comics on a budget like I do means that if a book fails to impress, it stays on the shelf.

Despite my misgivings, I've read the first two, and I have to admit that Thunderbolts is not on my drop list yet. Gage has shifted the focus onto Norman Osborn which, after his total meltdown at the end of Caged Angels, has some very interesting potential. The latest issue #123 has plenty of action, as the Thunderbolts are deployed to Washington, D.C. to help battle the Skrull invasion force. After impressively taking out some Skrull warships, the team's collective mojo hits the fan again, as we see Moonstone negotiating the terms of her betrayal, and Osborn confronted with visions of Spider-men, sure to send him over the edge again.

The best part of this issue is Osborn setting Bullseye and Venom free, probably not the wisest move ever. Other great moments from the issue:

- The Thunder-skrull

- Venom's new diet of Skrull heads

- Bullseye's "friendly fire"....whoops!

Thunderbolts remains my monthly dose of madness. You all should check it out if you haven't already. Pick up the trades, you won't be disappointed.

Action Figures as Art

Check out this art display that shows you what your action figures are up to while you sleep. Seriously. Mickey Mouse is a disturbed little fellow.

Is "Red Hulk" Almost Over?

Yes, I started reading [Red] Hulk after World War Hulk. Yes, I stayed with it this long, despite Jeph Loeb's attempts to make She-Hulk into an icy, icy, bee-otch in issue #1, turning Rick Jones into a giant, blue, armadillo-man (who should have been Red Hulk, in my opinion), the Giant Robot Betty Ross-faced Anti-Hulk Harpy Squadron™*, and Bruce Banner/Hulk written as if Greg Pak's fantastic take on the character with Planet/World War had never happened.

I have overlooked all of these things to this point, but issue #5 finally got under my skin. The issue picks up with Thor challenging "Ol Rulky" (bleh) , proclaiming that he must be taught a lesson. RH responds with his prickly wittiness that he does not believe in gods, despite the fact that he is punching one in the face right now. But the thing that really gets my dander up, is Loeb's take on Mjolnir, the mighty hammer of Thor.

First, we see RH holding Mjolnir and leaping high enough to reach escape velocity, all while towing an astonished Thor behind him. Then, RH explains that he has studied Thor and his enchanted hammer, and realized that while he cannot lift Mjolnir off the ground (not worthy), he can swing it around in zero gravity. Okaaay...if that is the case, then we set up the argument that physics do apply to an enchanted hammer. Fine. But don't then show me, three panels later, RH using the hammer to fly through space!

If RH can only "push" the hammer around in zero gravity, thus circumventing the enchantment that requires worthiness to wield it, then he definitely can't use it to break every other law of physics and propel himself through the vacuum of space.

The best line in the whole comic was "To Be Concluded". I certainly hope so.


*not actually trade marked

New Mythology

Devon Sanders at Second Printing had a great post on comics being the new mythology.
Give it a read here.

Welcome to Bill's Beta Ray Blog. I will endeavor to use this space to entertain you with my reviews of the comics I read, and other geeky things I like. My hope is to update this a least once a week, maybe more often down the road, and really get some good discussion going about the all the fun stuff of the comic book world.

Next post I intend to give you a few quick hits of things I've read recently and my take on each of them, sort of a likes/dislikes of the past few weeks of comics. Welcome aboard.